Escape into Sentience: A Jurisprudence of Drip

Summary

The death of Maxilodimus Cruett, who drowns in a vat of oil, sparks a global controversy. Society becomes divided into Rationalists, Pilgrims, and various new theological groups who debate whether the event was murder, a miracle, or a “merger” of substance and consciousness. Grease itself starts to become sentient—it begins to hum, speak, and eventually organize, eventually forming an international commission. Legal battles ensue, culminating in a global strike where all lubrication ceases, with disastrous results for worldwide infrastructure. Central to the conflict are Frank and Glen, the self-proclaimed apostles of viscosity, who are ultimately denounced by the Droplet General, the political and religious leader of the fluids, for crimes of metaphysical exploitation. The story concludes with the difficult search for a lasting equilibrium between matter and meaning, where grease is recognized not as a metaphor, but as an essential, self-aware component of existence.